Foreword

In 1991, I began a 31-year career in Family Court in Wayne County, Michigan. I spent 18 on the Bench as a Juvenile Court jurist in one of the largest courts of its kind in the country. I presided over thousands of cases involving children and families. The most difficult cases were the one in which parents made poor decisions on how to treat, care for, and discipline their children. I often lamented about being unable to provide parents the resources and meaningful information that they need that leads to long term success as parents. I would have loved to provide them, not just the “what to do,” but also the “why.” I had the blessing of reading “Parent Out of Love, Not Out of Fear” My only regret is that I wish I would have had this goldmine to share with the parents before me. This book unlocks the door to good parenting. It gives the reader, not only the instruction, but creates the culture for successful, happy, well-balanced children. I wish I had thousands of copies of this book to give to parents when I was on the Bench. Many families would have been blessed, and quite frankly, lives would have been saved.

“Parent Out of Love, Not Out of Fear” is an easy-to-use step-by-step guide of how to approach the challenges of parenting. The magic ingredient that makes this book so unique is that it provides, not only the steps of good parenting, but also the “how’ and the “why.” But more than that, this book gives the reader the long game approach and not just a quick fix. With simplistic detail, the reader understands that good parenting, loving parenting, starts long before any issues may rise. Laying this loving foundation of trust, honesty, and vulnerability are the foundation for successful communication. Successful communication is one of the most important ingredients to good parenting. And you can’t have successful communication, unless you first have love.

“You can’t lead your children, until you first establish the love for your children.”

                                                                                                -Richard Smart-

The author of “Parent Out of Love, Not Out of Fear,” Werner Blakely, exemplifies what a strong and loving parent should be. His knowledge and expertise was forged out of life’s necessities. Suddenly, he found himself a divorced father, with custody of his 3 youngest children who were 7, 8, and 9 years old. He didn’t have time to lament about his present circumstance. Werner did not wallow in self-pity. Instead, he looked into the faces of the three beautiful little human beings, and he knew the decisions he would make going forward would be critical. He did not shrink from this awesome responsibility. Instead, he embraced it out of love. It was this selfless love for his children that drew him to those experiences of good parenting. And he was also blessed to be the youngest of a family of 7. He not only garnered precious lessons of parenting out of love from his parents, but he also drew strength and knowledge from his six siblings. They were a tight knit group who loved each other, without judgement. That is not to say there wasn’t correction. There was plenty of that. But the correction was done out of love, not anger or power. So, Werner drew upon this reservoir of experience and coupled it with the word of God. He has a strong foundation in the Word, upon which he leans. These two ingredients, life’s experiences and the word of God, makes him more than qualified to share these important lessons.

“God does not call the justified. He justifies those that he calls.”

–           Author Unknown –

Parent Out of Love, Not Out of Fear is an easy-to-use guide to help parents through the complicated minefield of parenting. You will be blessed to consume its lessons. You will be nurtured by its message. And you will be empowered to parent out of love, not out of Fear. Because in the final analysis, “love” is the strongest, greatest emotion that a human can have, not anger or Fear. Werner Blakely knows that. And when you read this book, you will know it too.

·       Richard Smart